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Journals of an Abuse Survivor

12/31/2020

 
I forgive myself for being honest, for trusting too much, for forgiving again and again, for being me in a false world where values are upside down, for defending others, for trying to find some kind of justice, for trying to protect to relatives who were lost a long time ago, for trying to find some kind of coherence in our lives, for trying to find the good in others, they no longer existed, for trying to help someone who did not even see what is wrong because was lost long time ago, to try to be a family member who cares when they never see me or love me as a family, to be blind all these years and never see that, my worst enemy was so close to me, maybe I was in denial because I was resisting myself to even imagine that, to be so naive and keep betting on my original family, believing that they have a good heart, but the only thing they want for me all this year is to fail, manipulating people and situations against me, cutting off my wings so as not to fly, making sure I fail again over and over again and feeling happy about it, how evil is that, it sounds horrible but that was happening. I was resisting to believe that something like this could exist in my life, but the reality showed  me and opened my eyes, it is painful of course it is, I was suffering and crying about this so much and I continue to processing in my mind, my emotional health and my mind was devastated it. Unfortunately sometimes it is not going back, because when you forgive many times, they get used to hurting you.

Only God knows how painful it is to even write about this, only he knows all the troubles and how sad it was, but also only he could restore and renew your strength like an eagle and show his love and compassion, he was hugging and loving me at all times, all praise and glory to him!
​
I know it will be a new season in my life, a new beginning, I choose and will always choose to move forward happily, without hatred but wisely to never return again, because trust and relationship is broken, it's over. Sometimes God clears our way to make us Holly again, happy again, to open new doors, new people, good people, friends to become family, to love and accept you for who you are, to live without conditions.

I feel free now, somehow. 

I declare the best for me and my daughters, our health, our minds, our hearts, our lives, our future is covered by the love and protection of Jesus, restored in his name and guiding us towards a wonderful, brighter, successful future and abundance

--Abuse survivor, single parent of two children
En español
​
Me perdono por ser honesta, por confiar demasiado, por perdonar una y otra vez, por ser yo en un mundo falso donde los valores están al revés, por defender a los demás, por tratar de encontrar algún tipo de justicia, por tratar de proteger a familiares que se perdieron hace mucho tiempo, por intentar encontrar algún tipo de coherencia en nuestras vidas, por intentar encontrar el bien en los demás ya no existían, por intentar ayudar a alguien que ni siquiera veía lo que está mal porque se perdió asimismo hace mucho tiempo, por tratar de ser un miembro de la familia que se preocupa por los demás, cuando nunca me vieron o me quisieron como familia, por estar ciega todos estos años y nunca ver que mi peor enemigo estaba tan cerca de mí, tal vez estaba en negación, porque me estaba resistiendo a mí misma siquiera imaginar eso, ser tan ingenua y seguir apostando por mi familia original, por creer que tenían un buen corazón, pero lo único que querían todos estos años es verme fallar, manipulando personas y situaciones en mi contra, cortándome  las alas para no volar, asegurarse de que vuelva a fallar una y otra vez y sintiéndose feliz por eso, qué malvado es eso, suena horrible verdad, yo me estaba resistiendo que algo así podría existir, pero la realidad me mostró y me abrió los ojos, es doloroso por supuesto que lo es, llore mucho y aún sigo procesándolo, mi salud emocional y mi mente estaba devastada. Lamentablemente a veces no hay vuelta atrás, porque cuando perdonas muchas veces, ellos se acostumbran a lastimarte.

Solo Dios sabe lo doloroso que es, incluso escribir sobre esto, solo él sabe todos los problemas y lo triste que fue, pero también solo él pudo restaurar y renovar mis fuerzas como un águila, me mostró su amor y compasión, no me soltó, me abrazó y me mostró su amor. en todo momento, toda la alabanza y gloria a él!

Sé que será una nueva temporada en mi vida, nuevo comienzo, elijo y siempre elegiré seguir adelante feliz, sin odio, pero sabiamente para no volver nunca más, porque la confianza se rompió y la relación se acabó. A veces Dios limpia nuestro camino para hacernos Íntegros  nuevamente, felices nuevamente, para abrir nuevas puertas, nuevas personas, buenas personas, amigos que se convertirán en familiares, que te amen y acepten por lo que eres, sin condiciones.
​
Me siento libre ahora, de alguna manera. 

Declaro lo mejor para mí y mis hijas, nuestra salud, nuestra mente, nuest

A Time of Healing and Self-Discovery: Gig Ideas for People in Recovery

10/13/2018

 
Picture
For recovering addicts, getting back to work is an important part of the rehabilitative process, a way of establishing a structured and healthy lifestyle that helps them remain clean and sober. Unfortunately, finding a job that can sustain you, one with true growth potential, takes time and a lot of persistence and work. In the meantime, you need some way to earn an income and make ends meet as you job hunt. Fortunately, the gig economy offers an opportunity to make money doing work that draws on your creativity, abilities and personal interests.
A Transformative Opportunity
The gig economy covers an enormous expanse of money-making opportunity. Think of it as a chance to try something you’ve always been interested in but never had the time to pursue. For many people, it’s a pathway to self-sufficiency and the freedom to work independently. For someone seeking a full-time job, it’s a lifeline during a time of financial uncertainty. At present, 57 million Americans (about 36 percent of the entire workforce) are making money in the gig economy. If you’re not sure how it might suit you, consider these ideas.
Pet Sitting
If you love animals, considering starting a pet-sitting service. It’s an in-demand gig these days given the number of professional people who need someone responsible and caring to watch over their dog, cat, or whatever the case may be. You’ll get paid to provide companionship, go for walks, play, and feed pets while their owners are stuck at the office or out of town on business. You’re free to set your own schedule, prices, and pet preferences, making it an ideal gig for anyone looking for steady income during the job-hunting process.
Dog Walker
So you wanted to be a pet sitter but lack the room to accommodate several animals at once. Don’t be discouraged -- you can channel your love for animals into a dog-walking gig. Dog-walking services typically list online so dog owners nearby can find them easily with a simple Web search. Dog owners may have very specific instructions, or let you choose your own route. If you live near a park that permits dogs, you have a built-in selling point or, if you have the facilities, consider offering boarding services to your dog-owner clientele.
Music Instruction
Did you play drums or guitar in a band during college? Take piano or violin lessons in your younger days? If so, you might give music lessons. Busy parents are always on the lookout for someone affordable to give their school-age children music lessons. If you can work around your clients’ schedules, you can earn a respectable income doing something you truly enjoy.
Freelance Writing
If working your own hours is an important consideration, freelance writing might be your ideal gig. There are a number of ways to create an income stream (or multiple streams) writing online marketing content, newsletters, press releases, academic papers, blogs, and much more. If you have a way with words, there’s also money to be made working as a copy editor or proofreader. Set your own price structure, work when you want to -- what could be better?
Your Own Handiwork
Have you ever been told you should market the handmade objects you give friends and family for Christmas and birthday presents? Well, now there’s an online marketplace for people like you. Consider selling your creative handiwork through Etsy, an e-commerce site that emphasizes everything from toys and knick-knacks to handmade jewelry and clothing items.
Job hunting doesn’t have to be a time of stress and anxiety while you’re getting used to life after rehab. Use it as a time of personal exploration, during which you stretch out and make a fresh start with an exciting new venture. You can pay the bills by working for yourself -- you might even end up with a successful at-home business.

Author: Rufus Stanley RecoveringWorks.com
Image courtesy of Pixabay.com
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Hope Connection International

1317-B Buck Jones Rd.
Raleigh, NC 27606

(919) 377-1785

Deja vu Furniture and Home Decor

1301-B Buck Jones Rd.
Raleigh, NC 27606

(919) 650-3320

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  • Home
  • About
  • Support Groups
    • Mending the Soul
    • Princess Lost and Found
    • Caring for the Vulnerable Child
    • Addiction Recovery
    • Loved Ones of Addicts
    • Depression and Anxiety Recovery
    • Grief Support
  • Deja vu Thrift Store
  • OWL Art Studio
  • 2021 Gala Fundraiser
  • 2021 Golf Tournament
  • Supportive Housing
  • Volunteer
  • Calendar
  • Blog